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#220998 - 08/26/15 03:37 PM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: jabber]
Anne Holmes Administrator Offline
Boomer in Chief

Registered: 03/11/10
Posts: 3212
Loc: Illinois
Good ones, I look forward to Wednesday just for your jokes, Jabber!
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#221001 - 09/01/15 12:55 PM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: Anne Holmes]
jabber Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 10032
Loc: New York State
Sitting in a rowboat, the novice fisherman asked his companion, "Got any more of those little plastic floats?"
"Why?"
"This one keeps sinking."

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You can always spot an employee who's playing golf with his boss. He's the fellow who gets a hole in one and says, "Oops!"

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Q. How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
A. Put the remote control between his feet.

--------------------------------------------------------------

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#221003 - 09/02/15 03:37 PM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: jabber]
Anne Holmes Administrator Offline
Boomer in Chief

Registered: 03/11/10
Posts: 3212
Loc: Illinois
Thanks, Jabber! Funny as usual, though I'm not sure I could ever manage to say "Ooops!" if I were ever to shoot a hold in one
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#221006 - 09/02/15 05:56 PM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: Anne Holmes]
jabber Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 10032
Loc: New York State
I could because I've never played regular golf. Miniature.
Yes. Regular golf. No

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#221012 - 09/09/15 09:15 AM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: jabber]
jabber Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 10032
Loc: New York State
"What's the matter with you, lad?"
"Typhoid fever, Sergeant."
"That illness either kills you or leaves you an idiot. I know because I've had it!"

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A lot of people complain about their dumb boss," says Joey Adams.
"What they don't realize is that they'd be out of a job if their dumb boss were any smarter."

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Van der Merwe was carrying a box when he met his friend. "Guess how many chickens I have in this box and I'll give you both of them," he said.

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#221014 - 09/09/15 05:10 PM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: jabber]
Anne Holmes Administrator Offline
Boomer in Chief

Registered: 03/11/10
Posts: 3212
Loc: Illinois
Ha ha !
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#221017 - 09/09/15 06:48 PM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: Anne Holmes]
jabber Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 10032
Loc: New York State
Sorry. I was in a hurry!

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#221018 - 09/10/15 02:21 PM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: jabber]
Anne Holmes Administrator Offline
Boomer in Chief

Registered: 03/11/10
Posts: 3212
Loc: Illinois
Why sorry, Jabber? They were good funnies, and I enjoyed the new collection.
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Boomer in Chief of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
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#221021 - 09/16/15 09:15 AM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: Anne Holmes]
jabber Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 10032
Loc: New York State
A bachelor, just turned 40, began feeling desperate.
"I went to a singles bar," he told a friend, "walked over
to this 20-year-old woman and asked,'Where have you been all my life?' She said, 'Teething.'"

---------------------------------------------------------------

To impress his date, the young man took her to a very chic
Italian restaurant. After sipping some fine wine, he picked up the menu and ordered. "We'll have some Guiseppe Spomdalucci," he said. "Sorry, sir," said the waiter. "That's the proprietor."

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First man: "I can't think what to get my wife for Christmas. If I
give her something practical, I know she'll burst into tears.
Second man: "In that case, buy her some handkerchiefs."

-----------------------------------------------------------------

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#221022 - 09/16/15 02:49 PM Re: Worst Joke Wednesday... [Re: jabber]
Anne Holmes Administrator Offline
Boomer in Chief

Registered: 03/11/10
Posts: 3212
Loc: Illinois
I love em all, Jabber, thanks!!
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Boomer in Chief of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
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