Mitzkity, I'm impressed that you are so honest with us, and expressing something that many of us feel.

I'm a very enthused grandmother, but I'm as enthused to give our grandchild back to her parents, because I need my own life as well. I think a lot depends on the grandchild. At this point our grandchild brings us so much love and laughter that she enriches our lives. But if you ask me if I would be willing to be her taxi service and constant babysitter and so on, I would say no.

My MIL refused right from the start, and I never had a problem with it. I never knew what it was like otherwise. So my advice would be, don't start a service that you won't want to continue.

And another thing, adult children can be surprisingly understanding.

Mitzkity you have no idea what reading your post meant to me. I don't get the chance to post here very often, but when I saw your post I knew I had to reply to you. I have a very complicated situation with my own family...too much to go into here...but just know that this past week I had a little mini meltdown and have been giving some serious thought to what "I" really want and how "I" am choosing to live. It came to me that what I really want is to live away from my family and enjoy visits with them a couple of times a year...visits where we can all enjoy each other, not daily visits and daily (multiple)phone calls where I get to solve all their problems and bear witness to all their negativity. I just need and want to be ME for awhile. There's a lot more to my thoughts, but that's the basis of them and when I had them I felt extremely guilty for them at first. I mean, here when most people are moving to get closer to kids, grandkids, or parents, I am thinking about moving to get away from mine! At first I thought I was just running away from my problems..why not stay here and just set more boundaries? But I realized that even with more boundaries what I really want is to just live my own life for awhile, away from them, and have them come for great, fun visits...and then go back home. It isn't quite doable yet for me, but the time is coming. I still felt guilty for having those thoughts though, and felt like some evil selfish person, but then I stumbled across your post and I knew I wasn't alone. It really made me feel better to know someone else out there feels as I do. Thank You somuch for that post and for being so honest here!

Although I agree with many of the posts here I also think we have a responsibility to offer support. Maybe it's not just the sitting but the support your daughter needs. You can really turn your wisdom on by helping your daughter find the way.For example, instead of refusing to babysit and dropping it in her lap, find a good nursery school where you feel comfortable, encourage you daughter to start a babysitting co op (yes, I know, there are some real bad points to this too!),encourage her to start a play group, set some ground rules, like, "I'm only available Tuesdays." We all need a break, but we can be be a help too.